Bethany Siggins Image Consulting | Personal Stylist | Dallas, Texas

Bethany Siggins | Personal Stylist | Dallas, Texas

tough life

When Life Demands a Pause

by

We live our lives in a great hurry, running from this activity to the next and from this meeting to the next one. Then, we look back on a completed year with a satisfied smile for all the things we accomplished. Yet, what was accomplished? Were important things getting done, or were we just busy?

My 2018 Resolution

The way we spend our time, and the goals we set for ourselves become our legacy. It is my hope for 2018 and beyond that I am more focused on wisely using my time.

I Lost My Way

img 2061 - When Life Demands a PauseI was lost when we moved from Dallas to Seattle three years ago. My husband went to his job every day, the kids went to their school, and I didn’t know where to go except home. I was mildly depressed, and I perfected the art of time wasting. My days were a blur of household chores, text threads with friends back home and lots and lots of social media scrolling, liking and commenting. I can reflect on that time as a terrible funk, a semi-dark time in my life, or I can also choose to look at it as a giant lesson in embracing changes and slowing down.

A New Focus

img 0222 - When Life Demands a PauseSlowing down was an inevitable result of the move. Starting over in Seattle meant fewer social engagements and clients for my business. Most of my time now is spent writing blog posts, reading blogs, taking photos, and so on (all solitary activities). This slower pace has an upside. I can pick my twins up from school, take them on afternoon adventures and spend more time with them in general. Back in Dallas, my image consulting business was beginning to take off just before our move to Seattle. Therefore, I saw my children a lot less then. I now see this “forced pause” for the blessing that it is. How wonderful to enjoy more time with my beautiful, kind children during these sweet, young years. My business can always get a re-boot. Our kids are only young once.

Change is Tough

The “slowing down” part was easier for me than the “embracing changes” part of this lesson. I do not like change. New challenges frighten me. Moving to Seattle was the biggest change I had ever faced (except for becoming a mom to twins). I had to put myself out there, making efforts to build a social and a professional network from nothing. Three years later, I am relatively well-connected in the Seattle fashion industry, and I have lovely, supportive friends. I am proud of that. If we had not moved to Seattle, I would not know these fabulous women. They are the brightest spot of my being forced into a dis-comfort zone.

The Take-away

Life always has a few tricks up its sleeve. When life tells you to stop or slow down, do it. Have faith that there is a greater purpose for it than at first meets the eye. Try not to be angry or resentful about it, though these feelings are normal and you have every right to feel them. Just don’t stay at the pity party for more than one drink. (My thanks to Stacy for that great illustration.)

img 8167 - When Life Demands a Pause

You will arrive at the right places at the right time. All the things that are meant for you will be yours. Stay the course in your unique lane. Learn and grow in the “pause” moments. Happy New Year!

It’s Not You, It’s Your Metabolism

by

img 2826 - It’s Not You, It’s Your Metabolism

Please welcome my brother, Marsh Buice, to the blog. Marsh has spent most of his career in car sales in Lake Charles, Louisiana.  In recent years, he has written his own blog, written numerous articles for Auto Success Magazine and spoken on various podcasts. As his LinkedIn profile states: “Selling is not just a profession, it’s a life skill because we’re all selling our way to, through, or from something.” Enjoy his piece, and my thanks to him for taking the time to write it.

We don’t have experiences in life. We metabolize them.”—Depak Choprah

Many times when we are unhealthy, we cite the reason we cannot lose weight is because our metabolism has changed. We recount how we could once eat anything we wanted, no matter how much or how unhealthy, and we still looked good. When our metabolism changes, we do not process what we consume the same way. As a consequence, we become overweight, not just physically but emotionally, as well.

How We Metabolize is Key

We are mentally overweight and overburdened because we don’t metabolize life experiences the way we once did.

There was a time we could burn off all of the minor offenses in life, but along the way our experiences became darker, deeper, webbed and more entrenched. Experiences that once passed through us now cyclically run within us. We become blocked and enraged. Bitterness and perceived injustice become our warm beds of hopelessness that we lie in day in and day out. As a consequence, the good energies of life have ceased to flow through us.

What Must Change

To metabolize our lives differently, we must transform from a life of emotional resistance to a life of emotional resilience. When you resist what is happening in your life, you dig in emotionally and push against uncertainty, fears and uncomfortableness. Often, life will blind-side you because many events are beyond your control. But many things are beyond your immediate comprehension, as well. Your response to an experience is what gives it the label “good” or “bad.” Some experiences, although at the time are very distasteful, hurtful or embarrassing, later become helpful, relatable and applicable when you are resilient rather than resistant to what is occurring.

Those who live “resilient” know there is meaning and purpose in the difficulties of life, while those who live “resistant” never find their way out of their pain.

Use Hardships for Good

People living happier, longer lives have developed emotional resilience. They, like all of us, have encountered hardships in life. Those dismal, bleak experiences may have stretched, bent and compressed them, but they never let those moments break them because they metabolized their weakest moments into newfound strengths.

green2 - It’s Not You, It’s Your MetabolismLife, by and large, is unpredictable, but we don’t have to be consumed by the unexpected experiences thrown into our paths. We only have to metabolize them differently, resiliently.